I can remember standing at the alter the day I got married, and thinking is this going to work? Are we really going to be happy together? See I was raised Assembly and my soon to be husband was a hit and miss Baptist.
Going to church was not a priority of his list. His family values were different than mine, our morals were not the same, the way we conceived life in general didn’t intwine, but all I knew is that this man that was standing before me was the man God had designed for me one way or another.
For the first few years, bringing up church was rocky. I would get up and go, and after our son was born I would take him as well. My husband would stay home.
Was I mad? Maybe. Did it hurt was feelings? Yes. But did he ever promise on that day we said “I Do”, that going to church with me was part of the plan? No.
In the book “In Faith and In Doubt”, by Dale McGowan, he describes how religious believers and nonbelievers can create strong marriages and happy families.
Some may disagree, but I for one do agree in his outlook in this book. My parents were both believers until my father lost his faith in so called “Christians”, and decided at that moment he wanted nothing more to do with church. He was hurt, angry and had his view of how Christians should act, turned upside down.
For my mother, her faith was strong enough for not just herself, but for my father and all my siblings. There wasn’t a day that passed that my mother did not pray for my father’s heart to soften again so the Lord could work through him once more.
There is a great population of cynical believers that think that you cannot love someone outside your beliefs or religion. In reality it’s actually quite the opposite. Being with someone who does not view the world and life the same as you do, gives you a great power to explore each others minds.
Why would we want our thoughts to be the same as our partners?
Didn’t God create each of us to be unique in his own image?
In reality, Believers and Non Believers can create a strong marriage together. It is not our place to change anyone’s thoughts, values, morals or beliefs. It is our place to love that person unconditional just the same as God loves us, accept them for who they are, because none of us are without fault, and serve them everyday in a faithful manner. Let God be the the judge of whose ways are wrong or right. And when we try to change our partner, it puts expectations and strain on our relationship.
If we can set aside what we believe is the truth in our own mind, then we might just find something amazing that God has planned to create all along.
“In Faith and In Doubt”, gives couples the information, inspiration, and confidence for forging successful unions amid dissimilar beliefs, and a rare window into extraordinary richness their differences can bring to the relationship, their children and those around them.
I hope you enjoy “In Faith and In Doubt”, as much I have as I followed the journey of eight couples as they navigated the minefields of mixed-belief marriages.